Social Media vs. Reality: How to Stop Comparing Yourself Online - College Students in Charleston, South Carolina
Let’s be real. Opening your TikTok or Instagram seems to start out so well… but often leaves you feeling badly about ourself. It can feel like stepping into a perfectly curated highlight reel of everyone else's life, while you're wearing yesterday’s sweatpants and surviving off ramen. Meanwhile, someone else is posting from a boat party off the Charleston harbor, announcing a new internship, or sharing dreamy couple pics in front of the Eiffel Tower! Suddenly, you’re spiraling: “Why am I not doing more? Why don’t I look like that? What’s wrong with me? How am I going to afford that new serum!?”
If you’ve ever felt that wave of comparison while scrolling, you're far from alone. At Ethredge Counseling Group here in Charleston, we work with tons of young adults and college students facing the mental health effects of constant online comparison.
Spoiler alert: it’s not just you, and you’re not weak for feeling it. Social media is designed to grab your attention, and sometimes your self-worth, too!!
In this post, we’re diving into how to take your power back and stop letting Instagram, TikTok, or Snapchat mess with your head.
Why Comparison Hurts (Especially in College)
College is already a season of massive change. You’re trying to figure out who you are, what you want, and how to balance academics, relationships, and life goals. So when social media bombards you with perfectly filtered images of people who seem to have it all together, it hits hard.
Social comparison isn’t new, but social media has taken it to another level. The curated nature of online life creates an illusion that everyone else is succeeding faster, looking better, and living more fully than you are (Seriously, how come everything just works out for her all the time?!) And when your mental health is already a little fragile (ie exams, student loans, roommate drama), the impact can be staggering.
Highlight Reel vs. Real Life
The truth? For every polished selfie, there are 10 outtakes. For every post about a job offer, there were probably weeks or months of rejection emails. That blissful couple? They might have argued right before hitting record.
Real life is messy, unpredictable, and full of ups and downs. But on social media, it’s easy to feel like you’re falling behind because everyone else only shows their “best of” moments.
Remember: Comparison is the thief of joy. Especially when you’re comparing someone’s highlight reel to your “behind-the-scenes”.
How Social Media Impacts Your Mental Health
Research shows that frequent social media use is linked to:
Increased anxiety and depression
Lower self-esteem
Body image issues
Disrupted sleep
Loneliness and FOMO (Fear of Missing Out)
Charleston students we work with often tell us they feel pressure to keep up socially, academically, and even aesthetically, because of what they see online. It’s exhausting. But here’s the good news: you can break the cycle.
6 Strategies to Stop Comparing and Start Thriving
1. Curate Your Feed
Unfollow or mute accounts that make you feel less-than, even if it’s someone you know. Follow people who inspire you, uplift you, or show up with honesty and vulnerability.
Your feed should support your mental health, not sabotage it!
2. Limit Your Scroll Time
Set app limits or use screen time trackers to reduce endless scrolling. Try designating tech free times, like during meals, before bed, or while studying.
Bonus: your focus, appearance, and sleep will probably improve, too!!!
3. Practice Reality Checks
When you catch yourself comparing, pause and remind yourself: “I’m seeing their best moment. I don’t know what’s really going on in their life.”
Try this trick: swap judgment for curiosity. Instead of “Why don’t I have that life?” ask, “What do I actually value and want in my life?”
4. Reconnect with Real Life
Go outside. Call a friend. Explore Charleston’s beautiful parks, beaches, and cafes. When you’re immersed in real world experiences, you stop living through a screen, and start feeling more grounded and connected. (Yes, I literally just told you to go touch grass!)
5. Celebrate Your Wins (Big or Small)
Whether you passed a quiz, made it to class on time, or just remembered to drink water today (oops that’s me)… acknowledge it. Progress doesn’t always look like an Instagram worthy achievement. It often looks like showing up for yourself in small, consistent ways.
6. Talk to Someone Who Gets It
You don’t have to navigate this alone. If social media comparison is affecting your confidence, motivation, or relationships, talking to a therapist can make a huge difference.
Why Therapy Helps
At Ethredge Counseling Group, we work with college students across Charleston, including those at the College of Charleston ( CofC ), MUSC, and Trident Tech, who are tired of feeling like they’re never enough.
Together, we help you:
Build self-awareness around your comparison triggers
Strengthen your sense of identity outside of social media
Develop confidence rooted in your values and goals
Set healthier boundaries with your time, attention, and relationships
You deserve to feel good about your life, even if it doesn’t look “perfect” online.
You’re Already Enough
Here’s a radical reminder: you are already worthy.
Not because of how you look, what you’ve achieved, or how your life appears on a screen, but because of who you are.
Your worth isn’t up for debate. And you don’t need to prove it with likes and followers.
So take a deep breath. Log off if you need to. And remember that the best parts of your life probably aren’t happening on social media, they’re happening right here, in real time.
If you're ready to stop comparing and start feeling more confident in your real life, our therapists in Charleston are here for you.
You don’t have to scroll your way to self-worth. Let’s build it together.
